I know this site is very testosterone heave, but I'm hoping for some good advice regarless. I have question that I would like some advice on. I currently carry a Taurus TCP .380, and I love its compact size. I'm very familiar wih the weapon, but I will never be comfortable carrying it with one in the chamber. I have two young kids and the fact that this firearm does not have a safety mechanism leaves me very insecure. I would also like something with a little bit better stopping power. Because of this, I have started looking into the Ruger LC9. It's very compact for a 9mm, but it's huge compared to my Taurus. I've always preferred semi-autos over revolvers, but I'm beginning to wonder if I wouldn't be more comfotable with a small .38 special. Whatever I end up with has to be able to be worn in the Flashbang holster (concealed in the bra, and model specific). What do your wives carry, or if you are a woman, what do you carry? What are your feelings on the appropriate weapon for a mom to conceal carry, and why?

One consideration is that I would caution against smallish pistols for women use, unless they are already comfortable shooting such pistols. Even in a smallish .32 ACP beretta, the short barrel (muzzle blast) and small grip, made the 3032 Tomcat intimidating for the wife.

Now I am considering a 4" .357 (such as a GP100) with light .38 spl for HD and for getting the wife more comfortable with shooting higher power rounds than the .22 LR. It wouldn't work very well for carry, but the lightweight .38 spl might have some of the same problems as the 3032 Tomcat as far as muzzle blast, and would add the negative of the blast from the cylinder gap.

Make sure what ever you carry, it is in a holster that covers the trigger. Don't just throw it in a purse or a gym bag or a glove box. Put it in a holster ALWAYS. That is the first step to ensuring the trigger is not pulled. Next, if the retention of the holster is not enough to keep it from slipping out, then get a different holster. Last, and this is easier for guys, keep the gun on your body. Don't use a fanny pack, purse, glove box, messenger bag, gym bag, computer bag or anything else. ALWAYS keep it on your person.

My wife carries a Sig P238. Still a .380 but we don't subscribe much to the caliber power arguments... doesn't matter how big a hole it makes if you can't hit what you want. It has a very stiff thumb safety, and/or can be carried with the hammer down and a loaded chamber. It depends on situation how she carries it...

Walking to her car in hill top Tacoma? - chambered round, hammer back, safety on
Back yard bbq in Federal way? - in holster in purse, hammer down, unchambered, safety on

For her it is a balance of risk... likely hood of kids getting in purse to get to candy etc. vs assault in a dark alley.

I agree with this, but still working on getting wife to come around.

Take her to a range that rents firearms and LET HER PICK what she likes. If SHE likes it she'll carry it. Remember the first rule of gunfighting is to bring a gun. If she hates it, she'll never carry it. I'd rather that my wife carry her Walther PPK .22 that she likes and can hit an Oreo Cookie at 25 feet with than to try and force one of my 9mm's on her that she'd never have with her.

Without your location being listed, I can't tell if you're near us, but if you are, I'm sure The Missus would be glad to meet and show you her Bersa Thunder 380 CC (concealed carry) - maybe at Champion so you can shoot it, too. It has a key safety (for storage), a decocker/safety (can't fire if dropped), and it's DA/SA, so that heavy first round trigger pull is also a "safety." It holds 8+1 CorBon DPX which we feel is "sufficient" for anything less than a full gang attack. And it has an alloy frame - the grips are the only plastic on or in it. Ultra reliable and very accurate due to a fixed barrel design. Not that expensive, either.

For more stopping power (and bragging rights), Bersa makes a Thunder Ultra Compact (9mm), but we don't have one of those to show you.

Dimensions for all Bersa models is at, you guessed it, http://bersa.com.

There are many thoughts on this... and from a man's perspective... it can be.. very flawed to give women advice on how to carry for a woman (mother).

I will say the safety aspect is true regardless of gender and how you carry. You need to be safe.


Now, first I would say the issue of "locked and loaded" meaning having your firearm carried in full condition (Condition 1) or none in the chamber (condition 3) is a debate. It really comes down to comfort. Obviously you are not comfortable for various reason... Please note that I am not saying this is totally bad as it does not violate any safety issues for your firearm.

I will say you need to practice the older Israelis style of draw, rack and fire... meaning you draw and rack the slide in one fluid motion as you present the firearm onto target and engage if needed (in one fluid motion).

Sidenote:
Condition 2 (chambered with hammer down - mostly in 1911 - does violate safety rules to get to that function... which isn't your case at all). I just bring it up to clarify Condition 1, 2, 3

Now moving up to a larger caliber... A .380 is totally an acceptable round for self defense. I know some here will debate this with .22LR and even a 9mm. It's how well you shoot with it. Will it stop a full grown elephant? Probably not but you're not shooting at an elephant and you're not in a war zone expecting to be in a heavy firefight.

Carry and shoot what you are comfortable with. If you absolutely feel the need to carry a larger caliber so be it. It appears you have been carrying for a bit... meaning you understand that conceal carry is a function of size, weight and how you carry it. For a larger caliber as you have noted... you are looking at a larger size and weight of the gun.

From what I understand of the Flashbang holster... your body size (bra size) will directly be porportionate to what size you can easily conceal carry. From a safety aspect... grip and finger as you grasp is utmost important (as in any holster draw) but since once the firearm is released you are basically pointing the muzzle at your arm and/or mid section... its extremely important compared to a hip draw.



As an instructor and having done several women's only courses... I recommend carry what you have... and are comfortable with.

Any caliber in my book as it meets the first Basic Rule of a gunfight... That is to have a gun in the first place. Be armed and practice and become proficient. Get some instruction or get a few friends with guns or whatever it takes to get out and practice. Not just "range time" but also looking at how you will deploy that firearm in various scenarios and what your reaction might be...


Sidenote: many guys will say you need a larger caliber. Well if you can't shoot often with it and can't shoot well with it... the big flaw is that you may hit something (someone else) besides the intended target. Its bad when you miss but worse if you hit another innocent person because you can't shoot well with a "man approved" caliber... A 380ACP is quite a punch at close up distances for self defense. It's not a go to war caliber but no pistol is... as it's a rifle you want in those situations.

And lastly... about those that do not recommend carrying in a bag (purse), etc... Remember they are not a women. Again, teaching women only courses does lend to seeing that this is a totally viable mode to carry. Granted those "bags" are designed to hold a firearm and are re-inforced straps, etc and more attention needs to be taken when you are not holding it.

Maybe I sholuld be a bit more specific. I am the wife/mom in question. I have shot every gun we own, and am comfortable with them all, from the Ruger .22, to the .357 Magnum, to the .30-06 and beyond. I'm not afraid of the recoil. That is not the problem. The issue is that I want something with a safety so that I can carry with one in the chamber confidently. Also, I have three holster choices for my Taurus, all cover the trigger, and I ALWAYS carry on body. I dress like a girl, and therefore it is difficult to carry a larger profile pistol. I want something that can be carried comfortably and concealed easily with my wardrobe, but that can also be carried hot with safety on. I'm looking for suggestions on small profile handguns with .380, 9mm, or .38 caliber, with a safety mechanism. Thank you for all your help!

I haven't quite convinced my wife to carry a pistol, or even get her CPL yet, however, I know she doesn't like my LCP, she doesn't like the sting when it fires (neither do I for that matter). I think I could get her to carry our NAA .22 revolver, but I know she'd carry it in her purse, not on her body and I'd have to take the cool looking but ultimately silly little bayonet off of it so it'd close in it's little clamshell.

The Flashbang is great, she was even impressed when one of the characters on NCIS LA drew from the holster in one of the episodes & asked about it. I think this is a great option for a woman as long as you train with it. I'd recommend a revolver simply because there's less to go wrong, if you get a misfire, just pull the trigger again (assuming it's a double action, the NAA is not). No having to learn & remember "tap rack & bang" or other clearing drills, on a revolver, just keep pulling the trigger until it goes "click". I'm a fan of Ruger, so I'd be looking at a .38/.357 like the LCR. It's still going to hurt when you pull the trigger because it's light, but you'll never feel it through the adrenalin if you need it.

The NAA wouldn't be my first choice as a carry weapon, but it does have a number of things going for it. First, it's tiny, second, you can carry it with all five chambers loaded as long as you're careful to drop the hammer into the safety notches, and third, it's far-far better than nothing. However, it also has it's problems, first, it's tiny, so it doesn't have a lot of stopping power, if she decided she would carry one, I'd get her one in .22 magnum, second, it's single action only, so there's a bit of a learning curve to firing it, third, not only is there no safety (don't know of a revolver that does), it also has no trigger guard, and finally, it's a pain to reload, so you'll only get your five shots before basically having to break down the pistol to poke the old shells out, put in new ones, and put it back together again. Not a big deal on the range, but you'll never get the chance to reload in the field unless you carry a second, preloaded, cylinder (and you still have to take it apart to switch them).

Dunno if that was helpful or not?

I appreciate the advice! I agree the NAA would not be something that I would be comfortable with. However, your praise of the revolver type makes me think I should be more open to them. And yes, the Flashbang is hands down the best, easiest, most concealable holster for a woman, in my opinion

Makes more sense now. I like the G26 for its lightweight and concealability. I also like the bladetech holsters for comfort, trigger coverage, and concealability. Works great in summer carry for just a t-shirt and shorts, but I dress like a man. Of course it only has the trigger "safety", but I feel quite safe with one in the chamber and a holster that covers the trigger.

For a manual safety, the Ruger LC9 looks promising in terms of safety features, concealability, and capacity.

Does the TCP not have a ridiculous trigger pull? I have a bodyguard 380 and when I hand it to full grown people to fire, it usually takes at least a second try for them to pull the trigger ALL the way AFTER some quick coaching. You honestly have to MEAN to fire the damn thing to fire it. I don't like manual safeties on my handguns, as that is another part to possibly fail but that bodyguard comes with a right hander thumb safety that locks the actual slide so you can't even rack it.

What about education and getting your children familiarized with firearms and what can happen? I don't think you mentioned their ages but if they are old enough for you to worry about discharging your firearm I personally think they are old enough to learn. Don't treat your firearm as evil with them, but encourage them to learn in a supervised environment (with you).

TLDR: heavy trigger pull+education.

I am going to start this off by saying I didn't read all the replies, and I don't have kids, but there are a lot of options out there for you.

Personally, I carry a Smith & Wesson M&P Shield. They're difficult to find right now, but they are a striker-fire option with a manual safety, they are easier to shoot than any other single stack 9mm I have experience with. Having said that, it is more difficult to conceal than your little Taurus .380.

I also have a P238, which I saw was mentioned earlier in the thread. I love that gun to death. Also a manual safety firearm - I carry it appendix, which makes it uber concealable. I also like the appendix carry method because it allows me to keep a close eye on my gun. It's always in front of me.

I do think it's important, although dependent on the age of your children, to at least familiarize them with firearm safety. Even if that means having them practice the four basic rules with squirt guns or something (again, not a "kids" person).

Also, I don't trust revolvers. I may get a lot of flack for this, but in my experience they're pretty finicky. That's just me though.

You are correct, it does have a very heavy trigger pull, which in Taurus's defense is a safety. This is purely my own preference when it comes to my gun. My children are 7 years and 8 months old. The 7 year old knows no to touch ANY of our guns, includng the air softs that we have. Simply put, I would feel better with a manual safety.